"So now you finally know him."

That's what Rob's aunt said after I off-handedly mentioned that Rob's been lying to me about doing laundry. I wanted to say, "I've always known that about him, but I've hoped that he'd change." But I kept my mouth shut. There is no reason to revisit my relationship with Rob. The part of me that used to care for him in more than a platonic manner is dead. Gone. Shriveled up and withered away. Attention does nothing to that lonely patch of soul.

I feel like I've spent a lot of time blogging about Rob and the intricacies and complexities that make up our relationship. And, for sure, there have been many many many many many hours, days, weeks, months spent philosophizing on the merits of said relationship. But now, after my patience has been spent and my urge to move on has become final and definite, I'm left to ponder the next step.

Of course, it's more difficult than I make it sound. For one thing, I haven't moved out of his mom's house yet. I'm saving up as much as I can and looking for an affordable apartment in a nice neighborhood that's close to my job and campus. That right there's a tall order to fill, hence why it's taking so fucking long. I've hired a broker to help me, and while I'm still living in the house I've made it a point to distance myself from everyone. I owe this much to Rob. He has to know for certain that his family is on his side. I know that much.

Last night, I broke down that rule and told two of his cousins that I'm going to move soon and that when I do, I'll be breaking up with Rob. Up to that moment, I had considered this fact something that belonged in the "too sacred to tell" pile. The exposure of my words to air only show how much my love for him has died. His cousins nodded, understandingly, and cracked jokes to make me feel better, and assured me wholeheartedly that we'd still be seeing each other. They successfully made me feel better, and I went to bed last night relaxed and fulfilled.

I know that the end of our relationship will signal to others that it's safe to conjecture and criticize, but the opposite is true. Now that this chapter is closed, I prefer to keep it that way. Screw what anyone thinks or says. Only Rob and I know what we had and how it affects us. And fuck anyone who has the nerve to say "I told you so." You have no idea what you're talking about.